Wednesday/Thursday, February 20/21, 2008

Every heart has its secret sorrows which the world knows not;
Oftentimes we call a man cold, when he is only sad. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow.
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If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we hare half way through. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. WE WILL NOT REGRET THE PAST NOR WISH TO SHUT THE DOOR ON IT. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. That feeling of usefulness and self-pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.

Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 83-84.

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HOOOOOOOOOWWWWWDY AAAALLLLLL YOOOOOOUUUUU AALKIES.

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I just love the promises. They are one of my favorite passages from the Big Book. At times I feel like all of them have come true for me, and in reality they have. But at times when I read them, I think well that one is shakey today. Hmmm, that one is not as strong as it was yesterday; that one is not true today. It all depends upon where my head is taking me. But for the most part, they are true for me. What more can I ask for? I do miss the reading of these in meetings, but then if I miss them so much, I just need to open my book to p 83 and read on.

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Wednesday I saw the Endocrinologist. He took me off the med ACTOS. So tomorrow I start a new med, Janumet. Actos is known to cause a continual weight gain with people that have had a heart attack. Mine was in 1973. Actos was prescribed by my Dr. in LA. One more piece of proof why this profession is referred to as a "practice." He also gave me a diet, I prefer to call it a food plan, and in the list of free foods (those I can have a lot of) is diet carbonated drinks. I am still going to stick to my guns about the diet coke tho. Today was day three with none in my house. I did have one on the road. He also finds my blood sugars to be under control, my blood pressure under control, and he does not think the eye problem is related to my diabetes. He did an EKG, and a chest xray. I go back in two weeks. Sooooooooooooooooooo.

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Today I am Grateful for:

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My Higher Power, God that keeps me on target if I stay out of the way.

My Sobriety, that keeps my head clear so that I can walk through any path thrown my way.

Dolly, My Schnauzer, who entertains me with new antics she has nver displayed before and is always so happy to see me.

My Sponsor, who gives me strength by being an example.

That I have follow through skills to take care of myself.

For the strength, humor, and spirituality that I gain from my fellow bloggers.

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Y'all be pretty now, ya heah.

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The world exists the way it exists----just as a snowflake exists the way it exists----quite by design. You have created it that way----just as you have created your life exactly as it is. February 20. Meditations from Conversations with God, Book 1, page 49.