Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Wednesday Night, June 4, 2008

Fear is the other end of love. It is the primal polarity. June 4, Meditations from Conversations With God Book 1 Page 57
I'm sort of pissed off tonight. I know it will pass, but right now I'm just rolling with it. It's sort of at the fuck off stage right now. It's combined with a feeling of rejection and I just cannot tolerate that anymore because the next thing I know I will be in a depression. So I'm putting up the STOP sign, pissed off feeling, fuck off.
I have had Mamie for one month now. We are getting more and more used to each other every day. She is a totally different dog than Dolly was. I like this and I want her to be her own dog, but I sure wish that she had some of Dolly in her. Well, actually she does, just lets it out differently. She has the schnauzer personality. But Mamie needs OCD counseling. Yes, OCD counseling. ??? I only have one window in the house that goes from floor to ceiling and that is in my dining room and looks out on the front porch and driveway.
Now Miss Mamie just parks herself in front of this window. A Nat can fly by and she growls. A frog or a lizard get a rambunctious bark, a run around the dining table and back to the window for some more barking and a repeat of the dining room table. This will continue until the "trespasser" is out of sight. The other night she just went nuts and I went over to the window to see what it was and a lizard had come across the five foot porch and was on the bottom window ledge. Now this was tantamount to a "burglary." She calmed down after the Lizard left.
Now I can tell if its a varmint or a person. The other day a neighbor came over and her growl and bark were of a totally different tone. I mean, her stance was at attention her ears perked and ruff, ruff, ruff very deep. A car driving by gets a growl, a cat or dog gets the "Varmint" reaction. I know that pretty soon she will have a circular path around the dining table.
One thing that I love about Mamie is that she is very affectionate. She jumps up in the chair with me after whining or growling to get my attention. She does wait for a go ahead. She is very obedient and this is unlike Dolly. Dolly had very selective hearing. She minded when it was convenient for her. It did have its charm, but could be very aggravating. Mamie loves to cuddle at night when we go to bed and the lights and TV are off. Then she scoonches up next to me and lays her head on my upper arm. But she, like Dolly, does not wake me unless she needs to go outside. That is a growl, a bark, and to the bedroom door with another bark. So we are doing pretty good. I do love her and vice versa. Its just going to take a period of adjustment and I think we are doing very well at that.
Tonight I am grateful for:
God, My Higher Power
My Sobriety
Mamie, my schnauzer
My sponsor
My friends
Y'all be pretty now, ya heah.


Scott W said...

Lord, gurl, you should have heard the ruckus Bunny let out at the vet today. That pup can shriek so loud it about broke my new eardrum. And that was just because another client left the waiting room. He has this weird separation anxiety.

But he is adorable and he is mine.

You and Miss Mame will do just fine.

dAAve said...

I may have to sneak over and unload a wheelbarrow of frogs and lizards on your porch.

Any idea where I can get a wheelbarrow of frogs and lizards?

Todd HellsKitchen said...

Sounds like you and Mamie are getting to know each other... She's probably wondering about all the sounds that you are making day and night, too!


Bill said...

This tale had me chuckling.

Todd raises a good point. Mamie is adjusting to you, too. She probably thinks "Lord, if he farts one more time and wakes me up, I'm going to change his diet."