Tuesday, April 15, 2008


True Masters are those who havechosen to make a life, rather than a living. Meditations from Conversations with God. April 15 page 176.
Today started out to be a beautiful day. I just walked through the day, nothing special, did a movie, and watched television. Then this evening I could feel a change and wham, I'm in a depression. This just pisses me off. I have nothing to be depressed about, but then most times I don't. It just comes on like turning the faucet on or off in the sink or bathtub. However, in the sink or bathtub I can control the amount of water that fills the sink or tub. With depression, I do not have that luxury. I just have to roll with it and hope it does not last. Most of the time it does not, but there have been long periods of depression. Tonight it is just like I am in a free fall. I do not know how high I was when it started nor do I know how far I will fall. I do know that it has never triggered a desire to drink and for that I am thankful.
Today I am grateful for:
God, my higher power.
My sobriety.
Dolly, my sobriety.
My sponsor.
Alcoholics Anonymous.
Y'all be pretty now, ya heah.
P.S. It is now Wednesday noon, I've been up about an hour. And it is a beautiful day, the depression is gone and I'm going to enjoy the day. Just an update.


Pam said...

that is the same problem that my youngest daughter has. It's so frustrating. I'm sorry that you have to deal with it.
How great that you can find something to be grateful for in the midst of it !

Scott W said...

Maybe your gratitude chased that mean old depression away.