October 29 - All of your life you think you are your body. Some of the time you think you are your mind. It is at the time of your death that you find out Who You Really Are. Meditations from Conversations with God, Book 1, page 81
Hey there my alkie friends. I really identified with this quote. However, I've always felt like I was looking out at the world and not really connected to this thing that's called a body. Then I always felt like the little boy looking out at all the big adults in life or the men in life. I always felt like a little boy looking out. Then I got sober. As I have grown in my sobriety that little boy has grown up to a full grown man and now I am that man looking out of this body at other men, women, or children. I have finally taken on the roll of a responsible sober adult. I have taken the responsibility that I am not a victim, I am just another human being living life one day at a time. Another human being that bad stuff has happened to; another human being that a lot of good stuff has also graced my life. It's just living life, sober, on life's terms. I may not always like what the day brings me, but, soon, tomorrow will become today and I just may like it. Or NOT. But there are more likable days than the other. And that just makes it worth hanging around to see what the next miracle will be. It just does not get much better than facing it all sober.
Today was a great day. I'm still sore as hell, but in time I will be ok. I went to my appt with the endocrinologist at 10:30 and waited and waited. Then they told me he was not in the office on the last Wednesday of the month. Additionally, he injured his leg running and was doing his rounds at the hospital in a wheel chair. The nurse that was supposed to see me was wheeling him around. They checked my BP and it was way up. I told the PA about the fall and she discounted it as to why my BP was up. So she upped the new med to 300 MG per day from 150. Hopefully this will bring it down. If that happens maybe with the BP and the Blood sugar under control, the damage to my left eye will level off. In God's time, not mine. Patience is a virtue I am working on.
Tomorrow is the Laser Surgery day at 1:30 tomorrow afternoon. Pray for the retinologist to have a steady hand. I SURE AM.
Tonight I am grateful for:
God, my Higher Power
Mamie, my schnauzer
Y'all be pretty now, ya heah.