Thursday, December 11, 2008

More Laws of Ultimate Reality

December 11 - Turn toward ME and away from anything unlike Me. Meditations from "Conversations with God, Book 1" page 104
  1. Law of the Theatre - At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.
  2. The Starbucks Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
  3. Murphy's Law of Lockers - If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
  4. Law of Physical Surfaces - The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carper/rug.
  5. Law of Logical Argument - Any thing is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.
  6. Brown's Law of Physical Appearance - If the clothes fit, they're ugly.
  7. Oliver's Law of Public Speaking - A closed mouth gathers no feet.
  8. Wilson's Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy - As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.
  9. Doctors Law - If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there you'll feel better. Don't make an appointment and you'll stay sick.

Tonight I am grateful for:

  • God, my Higher Power
  • My Sobriety
  • Mamie, my OCD schnauzer
  • My Sponsor
  • The wonder of yesterday's snow.
  • That it was not here for days.
  • All y'all.

Now y'all be pretty now, ya heah.


Findon said...

Tahnk you for answering my question Zane. I am now fully up to speed on all things American. Love the laws. My old labourer from the steelworks used to have a really neat law. " As one door closes, another slams firmly in your face". Thanks for the post

J-Online said...

Yep. You're right about each and every one of those. They made me laugh. Thanks

dAAve said...

SOOOO true abot the snow. It was pretty and we had no slush to deal with.