GOOOOOOOOOOD Moooooooorrrrning Alkies,
This weather sucks. Rainey. Cold. Dark. Sober. So it's not so bad. I was going to build a fire the other night, but I still haven't gotten around to it. Maybe tomorrow. Procrastination, what would I do without it. Maybe get something done? What a concept. I could not sleep last night so I got up and went to people finder and finally found an old friend that I used to work with. Now to call him. Finally went to sleep after looking at the clock at 5:30 AM. Well, needles to say I did not make my Friday morning meetings. Got up about 11:30, 5,5 hours sleep. I usually get about 8 - 10 hours. Hey, I'm a tired old queen. It's a luxury for me. Sleep always has been and I used to get 1 to 4 hours of sleep and just did not function well. But now that I have been sober as long as I have been that is not a problem. Actually it has not been a problem since I finally totally detoxed. And that took forever as I had really been cruel to this ole body of mine.
Continuing Countdown. Today is Saturday, January 18, 1992. I am awakened about 4 PM by one of my club members. We only had three hours for all of us to get ready and to the Hall in Balboa Park by 7 PM. Damned I felt like hell. But not as bad as I felt yesterday. Tonight was going to be fun. The cocktail hour before dinner. Dinner with wine, speeches, awards, installation of officers. More cocktails and finally to the bars by 11 PM. I managed to pull myself together, three S's, and get into my formal Uniform. The Warriors Dress uniform consisted of dark blue breeches, motorcycle high top boots (Danners), a baby blue uniform shirt, tie, and name tags, officer tags, and various pins and awards. And a leather motorcycle hat. We really looked sharp. Our uniform, as it turns out is an exact copy of the Las Vegas Police uniforms. Not intended but just happened. One of my friends that had been in AA for two years started on me about my excessive drinking this weekend. This really pissed me off and as usual when he started on me I would give the "nothings worse than a reformed drunk (he had double digit DUIs ) or a born again Christian. He always said it was not that I drank, but that I drank while taking a lot of prescribed medications and psych drugs and he was afraid I would not wake up some morning. And he was not looking forward to my funeral. Of course my reaction to that was well enjoy your bottled waters and fixed a large margarita. I was almost out of the 3 1.75 bottles that I had bought, not to mention what I drank at the bars or parties. I just did not want the hassle. We finally made it to Balboa Park and there was a line for the damned bar. About 15 - 20 people ahead of us. So I went back to the car and got my go-cup with about half a margarita left and back in I Went. One of the hosts met me at the door with a plastic cup from their bar to pour my drink into so I could get it past security. Man, another hassle. Finished that and finally got to the bar and ordered 4 frozen margaritas. Hell the line was long and I did not want to run out. I took them to my place at the table and then socialized. Within about 45 minutes I was out and it was almost dinner time so I went back to the bar and got 4 more. The line was not bad. By the time I got to the table they had called Dinner so I was just right on time.
Out came the wine, then salad, then entree, then desert, then after dinner drinks. By this time I had finished the 4 margs. and needed more. I asked the waiter if he could get me four and he obliged me. Then came the awards. Then they were talking about this past summers run show when I came out at the end of the Easter Parade With only my red stilettos, a cock ring, and a big pink picture hat. Of course most of 125 attendees had been on the run and they all laughed and so forth. Then just as my 4 margs. got to the table they asked me to come to the stage. With drink in hand I went up and was presented with an enlarged poster size picture of me in all my altogether. Not only did they present it to me, they had to show it around. I was hoping to wilt, the floor open up, or anything to get off that stage, but no, I had to stay up there while the poster made the rounds. During all of this, I did not drop a drop of my drink and I finished and finally the poster made it back to the stage and I took it and sat down. By this time the remaining three margs. had thawed out a bit and down they went. And I got 4 more. Now by this time I had had a LOT to drink and I was feeling very gook but no where near drunk. Ya know how sometimes it seemed we could drink volumes of cocktails and it never got above a buzz. Well that was how it went for most of the night.
Finally we headed for the bars and drank for a couple more hours. Went dancing and drank more. I continued ordering my margs. by 4 at a time. I should have been blotto, but no I was just buzzed and I was really having a great time. It was one of the most fun evenings I had had since Vic broke up with me. I was still very much in pain over this and I think that is one of the reasons I drank so heavily other than the fact that I just plain liked it. We had stayed friends and I saw he and the home-wrecker quite frequently on a social basis. The home-wrecker was not welcome at my home, but Vic came up about every three weeks and spent the nite downstairs in the buildup. I digress but with reason. The bars closed and it was over to the same motel where we were the nite before. A lot of guys were there and the party just continued. I was starting to wilt and feel the gallons of booze I had ingested. About 3:30 I called it a night, and my friends took my keys away from me. So Greg, my sober friend, took them and drove us back to Blakes. I fixed a couple or so more drinks and went to bed. We had
to be up and leave to get back to LA in time for our beer bust at Griffs at 3 Pm the next day or actually later that day. I must have made it to bed about 4. The room did not spin and the clocked ticked on.
Today I am grateful for:
My Higher Power (God)
Dolly, my Schnauzer
Doing the countdown and realizing how really bad it had gotten
today I have another day of reprieve from the desire for alcohol
have a good sense of Humor
having a love of Laughter, my own
friends that trudge the road of happy destiny by my side
Y'all be pretty now, ya heah.