- Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.
- Law of Gravity - Any too, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
- Law of Probability - The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.
- Law of Random Numbers - If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal and someone always answers.
- Law of the Alibi - If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.
- Variation Law - If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now (works every time).
- Law of the Bath - When the body if fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.
- Law of Close Encounters - The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
- Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.
- Law of Biomechanics - The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
Another great day of sobriety is nearing an end. I made it to the 12:15 at Lambda and had lunch with the guys. My 48's are starting to feel loose, I have not lost another pound, but I'm thinking of reviving and putting life back into my 46's. That life will be mine. I don't really care if I lose another pound or not as long as this ole bod keeps shrinking. Please, please, please, Mister Gravity leave me alone for a bit. My chins are between my tits, my nips are down to my navel, and............OK I'll stop there. But you get the drift and it ain't the continental drift. But regardless (or to drive a word techie nuts, irregardless) of all of that, another sober day is coming to a close, I have read my sober bloggers posts, and it's going to be colder tonight that a witches tit in a brass brassiere. Let's all pledge to stay sober again tomorrow. It just won't get much better than that.
Tonight I am grateful for:
- God, My Higher Power
- My Sobriety
- Mamie, my OCD schnauzer
- My Sponsor
- Tomorrow is double dip day.
- Ten things I never knew about some of you.
- Sobriety Rocks.
Now y'all be pretty, ya heah.
8 comments:
I lost a 1lb too. YEA! I don't know what to do about everything heading south. I think I'm beyond palaties is a big way! jeNN
I'll be waiting for YOUR 10 things now.
You forgot the Law of the Crapper--that the phone won't ring until you are in the middle of the act (to put it nicely).
I needed some humor this morning. Loved your post.
J-Online, WHAT humor??? -grin
Hope you're having a great weekend, Pal!
Those laws cannot be refuted.
The Law of Economics states that if you get an unexepected windfall you will have an equally unexpected expense the next day.
My law is if I have one drink, I won't be home for a L O N G time... that's the "honest" truth!
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