Today was SOOOO Good.

I tell you there is no such experience after death as you have constructed in your fear-based theologies. June 30 - Meditations from "Conversations with God - Book 1" page 41

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Hey there, you bunch of alkies. How the hell are ya? Today has been a good day. Got up about 2 ish, talked to a couple of friends, started on my new diabetic med, went to a movie, prayed, and just settled into my day w'o any drama. Now that is a gooooooood day. I also go a call from my sister Myrna in Seattle (Dad's daughter) and we talked for over an hour and just laughed. I shared with her about my findings on our side of the family from Ancestry.com. I am going to make copies of what I've found and send it to her. It seems her oldest son (Pat 49) is starting a family tree and has run into a dead end on dad's side.

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I have seen two movies so far this week. Yesterday I saw "My Sister's Keeper", now that was a tear jerker and a very good movie. I found it to be about acceptance and love of family. Today I saw "Cheri" with Michelle Pfeiffer. Excellent. I thought she was Cheri, but that is the name of her young lover who was quite handsome. Costuming just really was part of the story. Cathy Bates also has a supporting role in this movie which just capped it off for me. I thought it was just full of very strong performances.

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I love strong performances, especially those I see in AA when someone is just working their program and not doing all this hey loook at me, see how great an AA person I am. Yoohoo I am really Mr or Ms. AA. Aren't I just IT. A friend of mine had a dream recently of throwing a chair at someone that I put in this category. I know that is being judgemental on my part, I have four fingers pointing back at me, but that's the way I feel and I don't try to be phony. I'm just me. If you like it, fine, if not I try to let that be ok also. Yeah right, just try to act like you don't accept me for any reason, just try to be judgemental about or to me. OMG, I just die inside. How could you do this to me. Don't you know how "fragile" I am. How can you claim to be so loving, so accepting, so totally immersed in AA and the principle's of the program. I made a comment to a friend of mine this past Saturday night and then followed it with a "Wow, that was mean of me." and his retort was yeah, but you don't practice that, and you are human so you are going to have those thoughts. You know whom to share those kind of things with etc. etc. Yeah, I don't try to hurt people nor make unkind statements to others nor intentionally try to hurt someone. I used to, but that is one of my character defects that seldom raises its ugly head. Yep, those thoughts do arise, I just don't act or blurt them out. I never knew it was so easy not to be a Bitch. But the steps, the principles, the traditions, the promises, and those 164 pages have given me a new way of life, a new set of actions and I love it. It just don't get no better than that.

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Tonight I am grateful for:

• God, my Higher Power
• My Sobriety
• Mamie, my OCD schnauzer. She's been so good lately, no self respecting squirrels are out in this heat.
• My Sponsor.
• My Right Eye.
• My improving left eye.
• Being sighted
• Having enough
• Not wanting for what I need.
• Humor
• The relief of LAUGHTER
• Friends
• All y'all.

Y'all be pretty now, ya heah.