Friday, May 2, 2008

Friday Night, May 2, 2008

Your world would not be in its present condition were you to have simply listened to your experience. The result of your not listening to your experience is that you keep reliving it, over and over again. May 2 Meditations from Conversations with God Book 1, page 5
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I thank each and all of you who read me. I thank each and all of you who take the time to leave a comment. With one exception - Micky. That twisted sick man that turns the word of God and the program of Alcoholics Anonymous into a channel of his own insane agenda. I will not leave my blog open for this bastard to spew his hate and sickness. My comment moderation is on for good or until I have proof that the devil from down under ceases to exist. I do not hate this man, I just intensely dislike what he spews. I wonder how many newcomers to AA this individual has delivered back to their old way of life. This is one double digit old fart that ain't gonna let him do it. I have learned how to block this kind of crap from my life and I am taking advantage of it. Fuck Off And Die, Micky, no one will care.
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Had another wonderful day of sobriety today. I did not make my 10 AM meeting but I was there for the 12:15 meeting. It was a meeting with the topic of Step 1. It is the practice at Lambda that when a person identifies a particular meeting as his first AA meeting ever, that the topic is Step 1. I heard a lot of good things, but I did hear a lesbian state that she had finally learned to accept faggots. I find this word to be very hurtful. I also know that a good many younger gay men identify with the word faggot or queer. I still cring when I hear a gay person reffered to as either of these words. I came out at a time when these words were said with hate. They still have that sting to me. But even though I did not like the one word of the meeting, I still heard experience, strength, and hope. That's what I was there for. I have not been to an AA meeting that I did not hear that. Thank you, God.
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Today I am grateful for:
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God, My Higher Power.
My sobriety.
Mamie, my schnauzer.
Memories of Dolly.
My Sponsor.
Fellowship after the meeting.
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Y'all be pretty now, ya heah.

7 comments:

dAAve said...

I'm glad you made it. It was good to meet Mamie!

Scott W said...

Gay men have taken back the words faggot and queer because it gives the power back to us. The years of those words being used as hate have given them extra power, they hold that energy. By taking them back it is hoped that eventually it will keep hatemongers from using them successfully.

Mighty Aphrodite said...

I was at the noon 15 meeting, too. I had fellowship with some of the other folks afterwards and they, too, were offended by the use of the word "faggot". As a Sapphist, or maybe not because I am that but just because I am an aware person, I felt offended as well. I'm glad, though, that you were able to find experience, strength and hope in her share, despite her use of the pejorative.
My late condolences about Dolly. I was at the meeting when you shared about her. I was touched by your ability to show your emotions. I wish more people felt it was okay to emote in a healthy way.

Todd HellsKitchen said...

Have a great weekend, Zane!

Bill said...

Odd that a lesbian had to work so hard to accepts faggots. We just pass along the hurt & resentment of being judged on to others, unless we take the steps to stop the cycle.

It's also odd that some folks have so much excess time on their hands that they can leave endless unwelcome comments for strangers. I guess that's what happens when someone is lonely and friendless.

Trailboss said...

I love me some gay folks alright. They are some of my favorite people on Earth. Too bad there are still such narrow minded people who are quick to judge a book by its cover. Sad really.

Pam said...

I don't like it when an AA meeting is not positive for everyone who attends.